Derf of the Day

CHULA VISTA (AP) — Authorities say it was a “selfie” that led detectives to a suspect in the burglary of a Southern California church.

U-T San Diego reports detectives found a phone at the crime scene in Chula Vista, where a laptop, cash, watches and other items were stolen.

On the phone was a photo the suspect had apparently snapped of himself.

Residents recognized the man in the photo and on Tuesday police arrested 26-year-old Adam Howe.

A search of his belongings uncovered property believed to be stolen from the Hilltop Tabernacle Church and an RV parked nearby.

Further investigation led to the arrest of two other people who were also found with stolen property.

By Mario Sevilla

Derf: a word used to describe the dumbest of actions. Usually used as an insult, it is known to be most effective when shouted.

Hello my name is Joe, what is your name?

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In jail they be callin me DERFy because it rhymez wit selfie. Wait…no it doezn’t. Fuckin hatas. I robbed a church and a RV and deez hatas was gon thru my phone and sah a selfie of me, mean muggin’ doe. Now I be chillin in dis jail cell. The selfie pissed me off doe because I fohgott my skin was white. Lookun like vanilla ice up in dis jail, I lost all ma street cred.

Y’all seen my cuz Jesse on TV doe? Dat fool be famass deez days and I’m in jail wit deez hatas. I helped him out wit dat answering machine, cuz didn’t give me any scrill doe.

Leaveth Tone

By: Dago Joe

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